So this morning, my dear friend Sarah had a post on her Facebook wall (open comments above). A post that I see her write regularly about the importance of being a donor. A topic that is close to her heart (and lungs) and the reason she could marry her love, Keith, just this past fall.
For some reason, this morning I shared the difficult decision that we had to make in the last moments with Zack. While Paul and I had always been open to organ donation, we knew that his body had been through so much- his organs were all failing and since birth, he did not have any healthy and ‘normal’ organs (proving again that our sweet Zack could overcome any obstacle and had lived a happy three years). He now had a gaping hole in his abdomen and we had just been saying good bye to him for the full day- doing tests to make sure that in fact he was brain dead. The lovely lady from the Trillium Organ Donation team came it- I remember seeing her face before. She had been a nurse in the hospital and then quickly changed into a professional suit to have “the talk” with us. She explained that it would take several hours to assess whether or not Zack could donate anything, including his tissue. The organ donation representative gave us a few minutes to decide, but we really felt in our hearts that is was just not fair to his body through more tests and us through more time. We choose not to investigate if he was a donor candidate. This decision, while I still think that it was the right one in that situation, has always weighed heavily on me. One way I could make it right in my heart and mind is to be sure that I became a donor, if the time came.
As time went by and I learned more about Sarah and another friend, Alyshia, organ donation became a consideration for me. I would donate an organ if I had the chance to choose to help a loved one, so why shouldn’t I ensure that this was documented for when I’m gone?
Getting online and filling out the form made it to my “to-do” list, but it never got “to-done” until today. Can anyone else relate to that? What started as a discussion on Facebook, was the encouragement I needed to grab a cup of tea and my health card and take literally 1 minute to fill in the fields to become a donor in the event of my death. You can even choose to allow testing on your organs for research and you can select the organs that you DO NOT wish to have donated.
As I sat at my desk at 11:47am, tears streamed down my face. Thinking of my own death is not scary for me- it’s actually comforting to know that one day, I will welcome my sweet boy back into my arms. My only request was that I would not donate my skin- I want to LOOK like the same Mommy that Zack knows. I also chose not to donate my eyes- I want to be able to SEE my beautiful boy again.
If you ever considered it. Do it now. Cross it off your list. My heart is so full knowing that I could help another woman marry the love of her life, or prevent another mother from losing a precious child.
Sarah Taylor
January 9, 2014 at 6:52 pm (10 years ago)Heather,
Thank you, thank you so much for making this choice. You will see your Zackie, and he will know you. No matter what, he will know you.
I love that you have given this so much thought, because truly, it is something that requires all the information for someone to make an informed decision. Saving lives is serious business. You help people every day through your work and sharing your personal story, this is just an extension of that. Bless you!
Sarah
Sarah Taylor
January 9, 2014 at 6:53 pm (10 years ago)Heather,
Thank you, thank you so much for making this choice. You will see your Zackie, and he will know you. No matter what, he will know you.
I love that you have given this so much thought, because truly, it is something that requires all the information for someone to make an informed decision. Saving lives is serious business. You help people every day through your work and sharing your personal story, this is just an extension of that. Bless you!
Sarah
Paula Schuck
February 10, 2014 at 2:54 am (10 years ago)Every single situation and person is so unique Heather. I have felt the same that I wouldn’t hesitate but I know some people in my life who have had zoo so much medical intervention already that I would 100 % support the decision to not touch their body any more. I understand this post more than you know and I am glad you posted it. You made the right choice. You are such a good mom and a lovely person. Honoured to know you.
Paula Schuck
February 10, 2014 at 2:55 am (10 years ago)So so much NOT zoo so much. Whoops. 🙂